There is a fruit of the Spirit that is on life-support in our culture--and it saddens and frightens me that it is dying. Without this fruit dominating all our relationships, all our words, all our actions, we become a hard-hearted people not a tender-hearted people. Without this fruit we become a hate-filled people not a forgiving people. Without this fruit we become a selfish, self-centered, Narcissistic people not an other-centered, gentle people--committed lovers to the good of others. Without this fruit our friendships are superficial, our family dynamics smothered in indifference, our neighbors' good irrelevant and unworthy of our active compassion. We are becoming an unkind people--kindness is on its deathbed.
Deep friendships can only thrive on kindness. Genuine friends are unafraid to share their joys of course. But genuine friends are unafraid to share their heartbreaks, their sorrows, and yes, their struggles and failures. Oh, how I struggle with this one--trusting the kindness of my friends. For kindness is not repulsed by weakness in others, not surprised by weakness in others, not disappointed by weakness in others because its focus is on loving others and not despising their love. Genuine friends are honored to lift up one another in prayer as they in their mutual addiction to struggles and imperfection desire to please Him. They are confident that they will be accepted as they are, helped in every way possible--by non-judgmental listening, by loving patience, by the willingness to bear one another's burdens without finding them unbearable, by the godly encouragement that hones and edifies. And even more amazingly if the one I love as my friend does despise my love, does despise my kindness, does feel repulsed by my struggles and faults, the Spirit empowers me to love that one even more deeply and unconditionally. Yes, He does. Kindness rests and flourishes in the tenderness and forgiveness of God.
And, oh, how deadly is a lack of kindness in our dealings with others. An unkind people erect fortresses to honor hate, build barriers to protect themselves from their callous indifference to the needs of others, feed feelings of inferiority, hate, and hopelessness. In Martin Luther King, Jr's "Letter from a Birmingham Jail" he poignantly mourns the impact of the deep unkind segregationist laws of his day. And what crushed his spirit and his heart more than anything else was the impact those laws were having on his children. Subconsciously, those laws were feeding thoughts of inferiority and a resentment of white people. And many of those who passed those laws and were indifferent to their impact were professing--and in many cases--possessing Christians. And what does God say about our attitude toward little children? Nothing will fill a nation with hate and selfishness more deeply and destructively than an unkindness that is self-centered, spiritually proud, indifferent to the needs of others. And just as deadly is a refusal to rise above those acts of unkindness through the power of God and to become instead as unkind and hateful as they were.
And how kind am I--tender-hearted and forgiving--to those I spend each day with? Do our family members know the joy and acceptance of forgiveness? Do our family members see our tenderness in all circumstances? Do our family members know that wherever they find themselves in the world, no matter the circumstances, that if they can just get home, they will find kindness and tender love? Do our family members know that because of the unconditional forgiving love that God in His kindness lavished on us at the cross and is still lavishing on us--not an iota of which we deserve or could earn--that we consider their wants more important than our needs?
You and I if we are to have a heart like God's heart must be living examples in word and deed of the kindness of God. Without kindness our friendships will be superficial instead of reflecting the deep friendships God desires for us--and wants with us. Without kindness a nation will implode, compassion will be non-existent, unity impossible, and our children's hearts crushed. Without kindness a family will be a house of self-centered individuals not a house of love reflective of the oneness of the Triune God.
"Be kind" is not sentiment. It is not optional. It is not random. It is the spontaneous, purposeful power of the Holy Spirit bringing change into a world--whether it wants it or not. "Be kind, tender-hearted, forgiving one another even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you." When the world reflects on our nation from its leadership to its smallest child, may they say "They are an undeniably kind, tender-hearted, forgiving people." Then, and only then will we be a great nation.
